Ahhhh. Now I'm in the airport. A place I have become very familiar with, as this is literally my 6th time in the Indira Gandhi international airport. Every flight in and out has been in the ginormous "Terminal 3"...I'm not sure what's goin on in the other two terminals but I know every coffee shop ..uhhh....forget that....chai tea shop...toilet and Indian fast food joint in this place. I always go by the "bazaar" and spray myself with whatever yummy stuff that smells like sandalwood...that's right, so I won't smell like pee. Oh..sorry that story comes later apparently.
Speaking of smells, there is some kind of strange phenomenon going on here that makes all deodorant instantly stop working. Maybe it can only handle so much sweat...I don't know but let me tell you, I've got issues.
And why is it that in all 184 of the bathrooms in this place (and other places such as nicer restaurants and so forth) there is always someone in there....waiting for you? They pump soap (if your lucky) and turn on the faucet, occasionally hand you paper towels...if your in a fancy one such as the IGI airport. (But not the Kathmandu airport. That one is absolutely nasty.) Now I am the first to admit that I can use all the help I can get, but the bathroom is one place I believe I know my way around....(ok, we'll sort of...ugh). There is a whole work force out there training to be bathroom technicians. Seriously. If you can work your way around a faucet (which let me tell you...sometimes it's trickier than you would think possible) and a paper towel dispenser...there is a job waiting for you here in India. Just sayin'.
Despite my effort to eat by my intuition I am beginning to rethink this whole gluten-free business, ...omg. I LOVE garlic naan. Holy moly. I don't even want to know what's in it or how much of what kind of oil is used to make it. I want it. My belly often...ok...Always..argues but....but...but... I. Want. It.
Yes...! the whole freakin' basket they bring you.
I am thinking of starting a movement. It's called "free-gluten"! ...But just for garlic naan. Ok, it's a small, temporary movement...alright, maybe I have an addiction. Help.
"Plain vegetables" means covered in lots of spicy sauce. Always.
I know, I've tried, but ok, just give it to me...whatever.
It still tastes awesome. How could it not? I'm in freakin' India. These people know how to cook some spicy food. Who am I to argue?
Did you know that...Two lanes can also be five? Huh. Who knew.
Fortunately, rarely do roads have "lanes" which means its just a good ol' fashion free-for-all. If you can squeeze your ass in that space, you're good.
Oh yeah, honk a lot first so every body knows your pushing them out of the way...then pull up in there...go on...now don't dilly dally...
...and then maybe honk some more just for good measure...
All cars in India are white. Ok, they all used to be white. There must have been a clearance sale.
On the other hand, there are a lot of gigantic trucks, which oddly are very colorful. Usually due to some enthusiastic young lad with cans of spray paint I imagine, but very colorful nonetheless. Even the big trucks have colorful scarves flowing off the back of their necks. I love it!
Still learning the art of Indian toilets. Often here, places will boast about having "luxurious western toilets". Western toilets are not always a luxury as you have to sit on them. Naked. Trust me. This is rarely a good thing. Indian "toilets" are holes in the ground with bumpy places to put your feet next to the hole. I have yet to figure out how to do this without peeing on my shoes. I'm like, ten for ten. This is a rather unfortunate situation as I wear sandals...'cause its like 35 degrees.... In fahrenheit that's like 150 or something. And I have pee on my feet. Always. Yep. I stink. That's okay, I am not a minority. At least in that regard.
Speaking of minority, I get a lot of looks. Fortunately, I get a lot of smiles....as well as my fair share of wide eyed blank stares. Yes, it's true, omg...I'm white, blond, and I talk funny. By some of the reactions, I must be a very small minority here these days. In fact, people are constantly staring at me. It's funny how easily you get used to it though. I just smile as big as I can. That's right people... I'm tall and I'm weird. Just stay back.
I'm thinking of going out in clown paint. Just as an experiment. I'll let you know how that one goes.
For now? I'm headed south people. There is just not enough fruit in the north. That's right I'm after fruit... and not just hard little apples and warm mushy bananas. Somebody show me to the place with the coconuts...
I am so happy and grateful I eat and crave foods that nourish me deeply and wholly.
There. That should take care of this whole "gluten" issue.
No comments:
Post a Comment